2 years ago, I’ve been pondering about my future: Where I want to go,what I want to do for the remaining time of my life, my long term career plan. I’m thinking of making a move. A big shift from my present J-O-B. I took an assessment of myself just like an inventory check. What do I love, what are my skills, what are the things that I know now and what are the things that I don’t have any idea of but wanted to know more about it. And it comes down to these 3: Writing, Drawing and Playing guitar. It took me long enough to choose which one I want to pursue. I tried writing and put up a blog which is a kinda failed. At first I was on the roll of writing almost everyday. I gain followers but not much. It was like 4 haha. It was a baby then so what?. I was trying to nurture it to stardom. But then suddenly work comes in the way and it makes it hard for me find a time to squeeze it in. Over a little time, i found re-blogging amazing pictures and some memes and jokes was a fastest way to filled in my blog and entertain my few but special followers. But then, an occasional re-blogging becomes regular. The promises of writings new article have been stuck somewhere in the back of my brain, loss and forgotten. When I survey my blog it becomes all the works of others.Not mine. I decided to stopped it. The drawing starts when I was in high school and looking back to my old drawing book, I did a pretty good job and I’m good at it. But I also stopped it because of school works and some distractions like video games and computer games, which rivals to my attention if I had a free time to spare. If I practiced it more and got a proper lesson and mentor, I think I would have it in the right direction and be more advance to it. Same thing goes with my love for guitars. I don’t know how to play it at first but luckily my dad was there to teach us guitar lessons for beginners. I learned the basics and learned to play different songs. I even tried to compose some melody and lyrics but didn’t come to the point of literally composing a whole song. I didn’t pursue it because it sounds dated to me. I was using traditional classic guitar (the big fat one) which is hanging on the wall of my room right now with a snapped low E string. I haven’t got a time to fix it. I could have taken all of this to the next level but I have some setbacks.The more I wanted to learn the harder it seems. And it was a challenge for me to control my temper when I can’t get to it faster than I wanted. That is one of my issue even now. I want to be good immediately and I know it stupid to think of that way. But it testing my patience and I always give in. When I come at this point it usually dawns on me that I don’t really love it. Because I don’t have the determination to be better at it. I eventually loss my drive and reasons. But then I realized when I put all my effort and heart and a lot of practice, it really works. Like when I’m practicing “Dust in the wind” on guitar. Boy it is really hard with all that plucking. But I got the first intro right but couldn’t continue practicing because of, again work. I still play sometimes.
Then I search for something new. I take interest on how I dress up. At work, a t-shirt, jeans and sneakers is a staple for me. I don’t care how I look until this one boss at my work catches my attention. She an old woman but dress very fashionable. Her outfit is really an Insta OOTD worthy. I can even wear it no kidding. I tried to explore and change the way I dress. And the girls I worked with took notice. Even my own boss which by the way also dress elegantly for her age. They compliment me on how I put two pieces together and even the shoes I’m wearing. Over time I occasionally switching from dressing up a little more fun and interesting to boring outfits. I don’t want to pour all my outfit’s idea at work because sometimes I’m running out ideas when dressing up for weekends and Friday night out. And I realized that I want to separate my image at work from the people outside my work. Something like double personality but not IRL. Because for me I don’t want them to see me in the same outfit that I wear at work to the same outfit that I would wear when having a good time either with my friends or family. Because for me it makes memory. I don’t like to bring my current work memories outside office. It also leads me to thinking that I don’t want my colleague to see me at my best dress. Because the less they see the more they will be more intrigue on how you will look at your best. Sometimes you got to keep them guessing on what you will look like when you are on full diva and they will be shocked because they don’t see you everyday looking like that. Well it is just a mindset on my current work right now. Probably if I already shifted to other industry and career, things will change. I also started reading magazine and look closely and read articles and not just browsing for great images. This was where my love for fashions grows. And it is not just dress and the trends. As I said before, it also spark my interest in photography and now with writing. Yes I’m back in writing. I also build my blog again but in different platform. This time it is in wordpress (fuelyourinspirations.wordpress.com). Just like Margaret Zhang’s blog site, there’s no advertisement. It’s my personal space. My ground for practicing and honing my craft. I don’t regularly put up new topic on it because I don’t want to write anything just for the sake of my followers. It’s for myself. This is not about taking it to the stardom. I’m writing what and who interest me. What and who inspire me. Most of my ideas are on my iphone or in my note2 cellphone and that’s where my topic usually started. But now it is not just merely an article. I’m also writing short stories. Which started when I become engross with movie scripts. It’s different from the book. I started reading at highschool when the first Harry Potter came out. It was also the first series that I became addicted. The difference between a book and a movie is that movies sound more local. I mean words and the way you say are the ones you would usually use in a conversation everyday. Its informal. Whereas in the book you can still sense some formality and restrain. So now I’ve discovered one interest upon other interest. Fashion, Photography and Writing. I’m willing to work for it. I decided to make a career in Fashion Work but I don’t know how to break in and since I don’t have experience from it, I kept on reading how to get it and what I can do aside from designing. There are advises on the internet that helps a lot and they said you gotta start somewhere. It may not be that glamorous and not exactly what you wanted but at least you got in. Then you can work your way up to anything you want to be. Still need some validation, I want to see or speak to someone from this industry who can tell me in person what to do. That’s where I took initiative. I discover this school called SoFA (School of Fashion and Arts). More like a Conde Nast School in London. SoFA is the first ever fashion school in the Philippines. I’m contemplating going back to school. But it will take me a year to finish it.(Here goes my issue of immediate results). Then I saw their list of certificate programs they offer that would lasted for only few weeks.I check it out and found out about Fashion Capsule for Fashion Styling with Editor Chief of the first ever international Magazine L’Officiel Ms Pam Quinones. This is it I said. This is the validation I’m looking for. I need to see her and talk to her and make connections. I booked for reservation and everything was surreal. I raised some questions and she was so willingly to answer and give advises and some insights behind the scene of her work. She is so stylish, authentic and modern: she delivered her presentation thru Instragram. The first thing I noticed about her is her edgy style that day. She’s wearing a sleeveless black leather body-con dress with a sleeveless denim with unstiched edge on top of it and a killer heels. And her hair! OMG, it so chic like a real Parisian style. It is a short bob cut i think and she’s not really about keeping it neatly styled. From time to time while she talk, she’s touching her hair and combing in way that I would never have that confidence to do so without a mirror to see what I would look like. But for her, even if she ruffled it she still looks good. And It looks so soft and hip I was even thinking of cutting my very long tresses to look like hers. She is so charming but exudes with strong and commanding presence. When she talk you can never resist to listen to what she says. All of the question of the students including me that day was about the technicalities and financial aspect of being a stylist. And we forgot to raised some fun question like I was about to ask what her wardrobe looks like? does she have a walking closet? and what are the must haves in the wardrobe? What for her is a timeless piece one should have? What is her signature item? These are the question left unanswered but willing to ask if we ever cross our path again. Oh I wish we will. For now I’m working on getting in may it be internship – Ok I also forgot to ask this to Ms Pam if they take interns with full time job like me – in magazine or with a designer house. Here’s some snaps from the class.